The Invisible Factor Keeping You Unfulfilled in Your Business

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Welcome back, super stoked that you're tuning in to this week's episode. And I cannot wait to dive into today's topic because I believe it is super timely given the time of year and New Years just being around the corner. And that's being slammed with messages to look into 2023 to set those big goals and those big intentions, with messages, telling us predictions of what life is going to be like in 2023 and beyond and what you need, if you want to be successful, and or stay successful. And well, I think all of those things are really powerful and potent and beautiful. Nothing wrong with them, I equally think that those types of messages contribute to the epidemic that I see happening. So prevalently in the online space, more specifically in the coaching space where I spent a lot of my time, and that is this constant chase for success, or this constant Chase, to find the thing that's going to help me achieve the thing that I want. And I can feel it in my nervous system. Now when I read those messages, and when I listen to them, I'm like, it's just more things to do. Right? When we hear what what do you need to be successful in 2023 and beyond? It's like, Oh, I've got to start a tic tock account. Okay, so you're telling me YouTube's really good, and oh, so I need to start like thinking about other things than Facebook ads, because they're getting more expensive. And oh, okay, so I'm gonna go Google ads. And oh, you want me to write long form blog posts. And now I've got to master SEO like, it makes you hop from thing to thing to thing and to live on what I call this never ending to do list. This not good enough yet to do list. 

And if you're operating from that perspective, you've probably already experienced massive levels of burnout, at least I know that I have, if you follow me for a while now, you know, my story of working in my brick and mortar, and how I spent pretty much four years on complete overdrive, working 1516 hour days, working seven days a week, taking a week off, maybe if I was lucky for holidays, or vacation. And I remember in those moments thinking they all lied to me when it came to entrepreneurship because I thought entrepreneurship was about freedom, and autonomy and all the things and I feel like I've just turned in one corporate career for like three corporate careers, you know, and I felt duped. And I've told this story multiple times, I felt duped because I was literally living on burnout. And every night, I'd fall into bed, and I'd have this running to do list of all the things I didn't complete that day. And, and it just being added to all the things I needed to complete going forward, which is like this compounding effect. And I see this happening more and more in the online space. And I hear it, right. A year ago, I quit created a quiz. And it was literally one of the most profound, thoughtful, thorough quizzes. I think that's on the internet. The results page isn't just like a one pager that was like thrown together just to get an opt in. It literally is pages of information, helping you identify what your elevated edges. And if you want to stand out in the online space, or any space, any entrepreneurial space, you have to know what makes you different. And you've got to be able to position yourself that way. If you want to stand out, and I share things from you know what social media platforms to be on, like, what customer experience to cultivate within your business based on who you are energetically like, it is the most beautiful frickin quiz. 

And I get the most amazing feedback from it. Things like oh, I finally have permission to do what I want. Or I finally have permission to do it my way. Or I feel like you wrote it just for me, I finally feel seen and understood, which is what my intention was from the very beginning. But I will get the odd comment that's like, oh my god, your quizzes way too overwhelming. Like, it's going to take me way too much time to read it. And I don't take that personally at all. I just think to myself, That's just another reflection of the epidemic that I see that we don't stop long enough to digest content or information, let alone integrated or implemented. We're constantly just hopping from thing to thing to thing and if it's not quick and fast and you don't give me the answers in 2.5 seconds, and I'm not able to achieve X, Y and Z in like less than two days then then it's not worth my time. I also hear this with you know, free trainings or paid trainings or I will see people commented on other people's free trainings, that it's like, Oh, it's too long for me to watch. And okay, I granted if the training was like five hours fine, but if those five Five hours, were the actual thing that was going to help you move the needle in your business. Wouldn't you spend the five hours to do it, but the problem is we're constantly hopping from thing to thing to thing to thing, hoping that that quick fix is going to be the thing that unlocks our greatest success and potential. And the reality is, it's not. Business takes commitment. Business takes discipline. 

Business is a long haul journey, if you're an entrepreneur full time. So long haul journey, sure, you might be able to start a business and sell a business. I mean, we did in four years, it was four years we put in, and four years of blood, sweat and frickin tears, like wasn't easy work by any stretch. And yet, there's this need to have things quicker, faster, these massive quantum leaps. Whatever happened to the slow burn, to enjoying the moment, just pausing teresting to appreciating the fact that we have a business at all in the first place that we had the one client that signed up, what happened to the gratitude to the one client that said, Yes, I want to invest in what you're selling. Yeah, it wasn't the 10 Maybe that you set your site on, but it's one. One is better than none. What happened to that, right. And I know how I was, when I started in the online space, I started it as an escape, to get out of the brick and mortar. So I had a ton of pressure on me to make sales and to make this work, which didn't help because I equally was in that position. And the very first year, I didn't like the results I was getting so I would pull launches, or I wouldn't finish the launch or, or I wouldn't be happy when I had one person sign up. What will everybody think it's supposed to be a group program? And I only have one that said, Yes. I've been there. I've been in those positions. And it was like, Okay, now what can I do? Well, the thing I learned from this coach only got me one person. So I need to go and try and find another coach that's going to show me how to get 15 people. And we just hop from thing to thing to thing to thing. And two and a half years ago, in this journey of online entrepreneurship, I stumbled across somebody by the name of Richard Wright, who started the gene keys. 

Again, if you've been following me for a while, you've probably heard me reference gene keys, human design, that sort of thing. And I stumbled upon his work. And he said something and one of the very first videos that I watched that literally hit like a lightning bolt in my heart and in my gut, because I knew he was directly speaking to me, although he was sending saying the message out into the world. I felt like he was literally looking at me and saying this to me, because it was something that I was doing, and what was holding me back ultimately, and that was hopping from thing to thing. And he said, there are a lot of modalities out there that will help you with your evolution and your growth and your success and finding your purpose and your work in the world and all those sorts of things. And I don't care if you sit with the gene keys, and that's your thing, or if you use human design or you do something else. But I want you to know that this is a journey. And Gene keys isn't something that you just pick up for a weekend and put it down and walk away and go find the next best thing. It's a journey. And so I invite you to commit to the journey and that was two and a half years ago. And while I don't read about drinkies every day, it's something that I reference from time to time. It's something that I pick up and I digest and then I put it down and I walk away for a while and integrate and embody, and I come back to it when I feel called to it, but it's something I've done for two and a half years now

And the thing that struck me so much about what he says it's actually kind of laughable is that he was shining this big old flashlight into exactly what I was doing. I had invested the $100 or $120, into this self study course that he had put together. And the very first video was basically saying, Please don't make this the thing that you digest, hoping it gives you some nano transformation, and changes your life forever, that it's actually an invitation to see this as a journey and a process, something that you're constantly reflecting on. You're contemplating, you're pausing, you're resting, you're giving yourself grace and moments when you need to that it's not something that you're just going to digest hope to god, it's your magic pill, and then then move on. And it was exactly what I actually had done, I was hoping that that program would finally tell me what my purpose was, and what my life's work is what I'm meant to be doing. And based on gene keys. And as you know, like that's not what is going to happen, because part of the process in this journey is reflection is contemplation. And if you're not giving yourself the space and time to do that, which I wasn't right, traditionally, I would have taken the course I would have digested all of the content, I intellectually would have got it. But I wouldn't have paused long enough to do the self reflection questions to do the work, which is the work. And that's what Richard read was saying is that the work is actually not in you consuming and digesting, enrolling in programs going through modules, showing up to coaching calls and like consuming the information that's being shared, it's actually the work is in the process after the fact it's in the integration, it's in the implementation, it's in the embodiment, it's in the reflection. 

And if you don't give yourself the space and time to do that, if you're constantly running on this to do list, it's just going to be a pattern that you repeat over and over and over again. And that's exactly what I had been doing for the majority of my adult life. And so as you head into 2023, set those big goals, set those big intentions, dream big. But also identify where you can integrate time within your schedule, where you're practicing some self reflection, gratitude, where you're celebrating how far you've come, not just at the tail end of a big win, not just at the end of the year, where it's like, Okay, I've got to do this because it's the end of 2022 or 2023, or whatever year it is that you're celebrating almost daily. And you're practicing the gratitude almost daily. And I would love to see where your life is and where your business is at the end of 2023 If you do that, because it's something that I committed to doing at the beginning of 2022. And it's funny because people will say to me, Oh, my God, you seem so happy, you seem like that you're just overjoyed. And I had a client recently say that she's like, you're just literally so happy. And I wasn't always that way, I was always living in this realm of not good enough, I hadn't achieved the thing yet. Even if I was attracting clients into my business, it was like, but it's not enough yet to be sustainable, or I don't want to ride the, you know, roller coaster of where's my next client going to come from. And I was never really stopping long enough to celebrate. And so I invite you to do that because it has transformed my business. I've tripled my sales, I think as a result of that, because one, I have this much deeper, grounded purpose and vision within myself of why I'm doing it. But I'm also practicing gratitude, every single day, and not just for my business, but for life as well. And I think that's so beautiful. I think we can compartmentalize our business. Sometimes it's like we're so heavily focused on making it work or getting it to work. And we forget about the life outside of the business. 

And so that's my invitation for you as you head into 2023. And where you can integrate this more into your life and to be really intentional about the information that you digest and you consume, like don't just spend hour scrolling or opting in to all the freebies or you know, any of the stuff that you're just is going to collect dust in your online virtual library or your email list. Like be very intentional about who is sending you emails, you know, and if that's me, I would love that if it's not me, I haven't you know, I don't, I wouldn't take any offense to it. But when you were intentional about where you put your time and your energy magic will happen in your life and your business. I Promise. So, without further ado, I cannot wait till next week's episode I have a special guest on Mickey Kennedy. And He is a poet. He is a creative writer, and he's going to share how he's leveraged that to build a very successful business, but also how to stand out and how to get PR pitches picked up and how to get stories picked up. So without further ado, I cannot wait for him to be on the show next week. Subscribe to the show so you don't miss when that episode drops. Cheers.